Being the Bridge
I am a bridge.
Everyone knows at least one bridge– the type of person who transcends a group of friends and a group of non-friends and happily co-exists in either group. The bridge prefers to make decisions based on their own judgment and thus often appears hard-headed or stubborn, strayng from the pack. Values are of the highest priority to the bridge, in business and in life, and while he/she appears to act as a link between static bodies, it is in the bridges nature to be steady, always, even while it’s connection points are a flutter.
The truth is, in this space, there are few bridges and plenty of stranded populations. There is far too much groupthink in a space where free-thought and expression is foundational, and cracking. How many times have you read a half-assed post on a frequented blog page and seen 20+ comments, all filler (for a good conversation on critique in social media, see Heather Yaxley’s post and read the comments)?
There are plenty of folks I respect in the blogosphere, and they do not necessarily respect each other in return. I’m alright with that; whenever you get a group of great minds in the same room, there will always be disagreement, there will always be alliances and barriers to protect egos.
John Stuart Mill once argued that people are inherently selfish– I know it is this nature that governs my logic. Still, I can’t defend branding a person negatively because one of my contacts doesn’t get along with them.
Readers, know this: if you get on my bad side, it’s because you damn well belong there.
~ by Brandon Carlos on February 19, 2009.
Posted in PR/SEO/SEM
Tags: Brandon Carlos, PR Ninja, social media, social networking
Brandon – what I also like about the concept of being a bridge is that the point of a bridge is also to go somewhere – connecting different places and enabling those on either side to cross over and gain new experiences. The best bridges are those that connect very different places and open up the opportunity for more understanding. Without bridges we’d all just be islands.
I also find that “bridges” have a keen sense of what works, and what works very well! Very few of us actually make ‘connections’ in our everyday lives, and see the relationships that exist or that are possible. It’s the attention to the world around us that gets us places, and presents possibilities. I would also argue that “bridges” are also “influencers” – find the bridge and therein, you find a leader.
@Heather– yes, the analogy I often use when connecting with others online is that of the library. We are all our own book of knowledge (an island) and the more bridges we build, the larger our library grows.
@Stafeen– Bridges are influencers, and they’re also wedges. We tend to stick out like a sore thumb; this does one of two things:
1. Intrigues and attracts
2. Scares the hell out of people
Then again, some populations are stranded for a reason, and frankly not all bridges deserve to be built. A responsible “bridge” can make that distinction in most, if not all, cases, strategically networking (just as every book in a library isn’t actually worthwhile to a discerning reader).
And I wouldn’t necessarily consider most either influencers or wedges – especially if they’re the ones to label themselves those things. People who truly think for themselves don’t worry about whether or not others are following them (being “influenced”) or whether or not they’re able to bring two groups together.
You absolutely shouldn’t make your judgments of others simply based on what another colleague or friend thinks. At the same time, it would be irresponsible not to try to understand where they’re coming from. In most cases, unless you discover there’s some personal vendetta there, they’re coming from a place of wisdom and experience that you simply don’t have yet regarding those people (assuming you’re relatively new to them when making the decision). I’ve found that despite giving people a chance up front (and even multiple chances in several examples), in most cases my more experienced colleagues have proven to be correct in the grand scheme of things. What you should be keeping in mind is their reason for feeling as they do – is it backed up by facts and the other party’s past behavior, or is it just a case of “not liking” someone without a legitimate reason?
If the former, anyone who truly thinks for themselves would fully consider that when making a critical decision as to what kind of network they really want to build and associate themselves with (along with their own experiences and observations), and if the latter they should be smart enough to dismiss it without much further thought.
Jenn, I don’t disagree with you on any of your points. I also like that you, as someone within my circle of contacts, have the context for this post.
I absolutely respect the thoughts, feelings, advice of my contacts; a good chunk of whom are WAY more experienced than I am. Thank you for weighing-in on this.
Just passing by.Btw, your website have great content!
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